How long is the string of the ‘stopgap’? You know, that moment after you finish university. You occupy a job just to pay for your existence, you run into feelings of uncertainty towards your ideal, your passion- the ‘end goal’. You become unsure of where the next steps are located, never mind how to place a foot on them. Although, once found it’s as though you’re hesitating to kick yourself to…
SHOOT, OH… AND… THEY SCORE!!
The stopgap is a tricky place to be. It is the moment of life when your current employment is consuming all your time to think and focus on your naturally academic or creative streak. It numbs the very piece of the self that so happens to drug you, releasing euphoria, stimulating the mind with passion and the dream of utopia.
Wouldn’t life be easy if I could write metaphorical scripture and ear tingling sounds to perform daily? Sitting on a balcony in the streets of Paris, Berlin or Rome?
Yes, quite easy it sounds. But right now, London is very, very, very grey and I am writing on my iPad in a gallery, mirroring my future aspiration. Ironic.
I don’t know about you, but the stopgap can instigate passivity towards my own practice. When rushed I go into autopilot mode. I get the job done and am relieved when the clock strikes my time. All these hours add up towards less availability of self-progression. As tiredly despised as I am with this interval, I want to establish the forgettable positives to this unknown period of life.
The uncomfortable sensation of the stopgap should not and will not last forever. You have to withdraw yourself from it. The search will be long, short, time-consuming, tiring, and stressful, exciting, confusing, frustrating and skilful. It is here for you to figure your tumbling thoughts out, and make those vital choices, positive or negative.
While sitting in front of the reflection of my epitome, I spectate a change of thought. This has turned into somewhat of a cliché memoir…
Besides this, the point I’m establishing is towards the symbolisation of the stopgap. It is the motivational pause to drive you towards your utopia. Remembering that no matter how heavy the pull of your cemented feet become, the sensation will continue to last unless you grapple onto the crane of devotion. Resume to progress your individual thoughts and creativity, acting upon your distinction from others. Your retaliation will transcend the stopgap into a trophy, found within your memory, evoking the self to recall the grind you enforced towards the resonant cement once found at your feet.
Illustration: Mia Maric